gwenyyy

fuck

2006-05-23T20:30:56Z

i really dont know what the fuck im doing with my life. i seem to fuck shit up all the time.
this is driving me crazy. i hate listenin to other people tell me what to do or how to act. i totally need to fuckin clear my mind and get away for awhile from everyone. im so stressed out i cant even control myself. i really need to start fresh and new. i wish i could go back and just change a couple things. oh yea and fuck my parents. i need new friends. seriously.

stressed

2006-05-18T00:45:45Z

life is really pushing it for me right now. i really cant stand any single one of my friends besides hannah and a few. i really fuckin hate that god damn school. i dont even know who bieleve anymore. i should just go on and not talk to anyone anymore. cause really everytime i make new friends i always end up getting in the middle of everything. i really fuckin cant stand it. now i know who my true friends are. and ill tell you its not alot either. but i dont really give a shit how many friends i have. as long as i have a few to keep me standing. fuck school. fuck friends. fuck boys. everything seems to go wrong when i start to get happy. its like god doesnt want me to be happy or something. i cant stand the situations i get in. i now decided that i will not get involved no longer. plus, everytime i try to be nice to people. it never comes back to me. i get fucked everytime. i shouldnt even try anymore. nothings ever enough with me and i cant stand that about myself. nothings ever good enough. i wish i werent like this i really do. sometimes i just say fuck it and get over it. and then my other half of me says no you cant forget this how could you? sucks to me really. i really can not wait to get of here and live far far away from this place as possible. hopefully this weekend will be better for me i hope. damn and how i try to make everyone happy. now i really know. this is high school and what is a friend anyway?

gwenyyy @ 2006-05-15T15:04:00

2006-05-15T20:11:40Z

so for mothers day we all took my mom to philly and we went to a museum and then we went to
the park to eat dinner. and we teached blaise how to play frisbe. court sucks at it. so do i. brittens pretty good though. that night i took my extentions out cause they were gettin kinda nasty.
then i got ready for school and shit. today i got up realy late cause i got on the computer last night before bed and never got off. i hate when i do that. ahah. today was pretty good. everyones nice sometimes. i like it. my stomache hurt real bad though. friday hopefully alica will do my extentions cause i cant do anything with my hair right now so it sucks. next sunday is amandas birthday and shit. cant wait for that. oh and let me go back to saturday night. that was fun. me, amanda lynn s and her friend amanda lynn hung out for a little. then we went to her friend austin took us to her friends zacks. we stayed there for a little and that was pretty neat. then we came back and amanda was real tired so we all went to bed. then sunday morning when i left i forgot my phone. friday i forgot some shit too. i always seem to forget shit at peoples house. well today i got a fuckin horse lesson and i really dont want it cause its cold and rainy now. ew i have to go tanning today too. i cant wait i love it even if i get cancer ill probably end up getting it anyway.

love,
gwenyyyxox

fuck

2006-05-13T18:45:23Z

my weekend has been very good so far. i slept over amanda lynn sikoras last night. i had the best time. we went to her friends house. we went to toysRus and we also went to barns and noble. shes such a cutie i love her. then this morning we woke up and watched harry potter and went to dunkin donuts. then i helped her get ready for the day. i gave her the present i got her. she liked it alot. i fuckin love her. tonight i hopefully am hangin out with my hannah cause i havent seen her in yesterday. thats way long. i love her. someone stole my fuckin cigarettes. that or i lost them. this sucks. i need money and a job. fuck